Sacrifice

This was my speech during the wedding of my cousin Jocelyn to Darrin Fankhanel on December 18, 2014 at Bearland Paradise Resort, Tigbauan, Iloilo.

I am Ian Tayona, one of the dysfunctional first cousins of the bride.

When I was a kid, I would hear stories from my parents about my cousins. I could still remember that I looked up to my cousin, the bride, because she graduated at the top of her class. And for a family who didn’t have really that much in life when it comes to material things, we prided ourselves in the little achievements that we bestow to our parents during recognition or graduation day.

Fast forward to many years, I have come to a level where I could freely talk about anything with my cousin. Her reason for striving harder for the family. The memories of Lola Auring and Lolo Narding. Her failed relationships that gave life lessons.

And all of these communications was done through Facebook. A very helpful tool with families that has a member who works abroad for the family.

There is a meme on social media and is posted and reposted on someone’s Facebook profile that says this way: “Cousins are usually the first friends we have as children. No one will ever understand your crazy family like your cousins do even if you haven’t talked much lately.”

In essence, this is true.

I have spent countless times talking to my cousin about my aspirations and she was there to encourage me to press on. Her positivity and determination propelled her to live and work halfway around the world just to give better chances for her future, her family and contribute to the society.

If you are into Suzanne Collins’ The Mockingjay, there’s a quote there that mentions love: “It’s the things we love most that destroys us.” In the context of that quote though, the writer meant that we tend to sacrifice everything that we have even if in the end it leads to rejecting our own need for self-preservation just to protect the ones we love.

Sacrifice is love. And I have seen it in the life of my cousin. I could even remember the time when we sent her off at the airport and she told us that when we say our goodbyes, we leave immediately because she does not want to look back at us anymore. It might make her sad.

The many stories of the Overseas Filipino Workers who leave their comfort zones just to provide better chances for the family is interwoven with the word sacrifice. And in my cousin’s life is one of those stories interlaced with this word.

Today’s milestone proves that when we give love, we receive love in return. But because in our family, and I mean the blood that runs in the Tayonas, the genetic make-up, we tend to love so passionately to the point of breaking, Darrin is just one blessed guy. He is loved forever.

When Manang Jocelyn first told me about Darrin and she mentioned that he is a reader, I told her that readers are good companions because they are more empathetic persons. I may have contributed to analyzing Darrin’s persona and affirming that he is the Aladdin to her Jasmine, the Prince Eric to her Ariel, the Prince Charming to her Cinderella and the King of the North (Game of Thrones reference) to her Talisa Maegyr.

What I’m really trying to say is that today, there will be no momentous event without the word sacrifice. Darrin and Manang Jocelyn even traveled halfway around the world just to get married in the sandy shores of Panay and be with us tonight.

Because apparently, the greatest love of all was manifested when a Father sent his Son to shed his blood on the cross, giving His life away so that we live.

And as we live, we get to love selflessly, faithfully and sacrificially.

To Manang Jocelyn and Darrin. To sacrifice. To love.